We all know the feeling of being thirsty. We understand the grumbling of God’s people, dying of thirst in the desert. Just as the Samaritan women brought her jar to the well, we too carry our water bottles.
I always had a large glass of ice water waiting for me as I worked in my yard. Often under the sweltering sun, I was refreshed by cool spring waters. I was invigorated. I felt better about myself and my outlook improved. But was this due to quenching my thirst, or something far deeper?
In the third step of the examen, Review My Day, Jim Manney talks of the “reality beneath the reality. We’re looking to strip away our disordered attachments and get at what we want,” — what we are really thirsting for. St. Ignatius would say to start by examining our feelings throughout the day.
When our thirst is quenched, he called this Consolation, that we have moved toward God’s love, which brings feelings of peace, security and joy. When our thirst is unfulfilled, he called this Desolation, that we failed to acknowledge God’s love, which leaves a troubled spirit, plagued with anxiety, doubt, and dejection.
We know God was with his people in the desert. But they were people troubled in spirit, misunderstanding what they thirsted for, — not water, but to trust in the loving care of God. By contrast, the Samaritan women’s thirst moved from her reality to a deeper thirst for insight into the reality of God’s presence in her life. “Could he possibly be the Christ?” In the desert, disordered attachments (sins) brought spiritual blindness of God’s actual presence in the lives of the people. But the Samaritan woman, by acknowledging her sins, received the overflowing spring of love and graces from Christ!
Fr. Owen says, “Let’s not forget: God works with what is.” As I reflect on “what is,” I know for me, that my Consolation was not based on what I accomplished in the yard. During that time, I reviewed my workweek, analyzing how to improve myself. I could feel my anxieties and doubts dissipate, becoming more at peace. Slowly, my reality — the what is — opened to enjoy the created reality of God. Yes, my thirst was refreshed, as I opened my heart to the Spirit, “a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”
God Bless
Deacon Eric